I rent a small house just down the street to my oldest sons girlfriend. She's a nurse and works nights, and last night her house was broken into.
I was sitting in the cold ass den, watching Jepardy when my son rushes in and tells me that someone had beat the door down at her house. He had just returned from school that evening...
So, I grab my trusty 2nd ammendment right and hustle 3 doors down to see if there is anybody interested in a game of catch, no takers found, I assess the situation as son calls the police ( main station 4 blocks away ). The solid wood door is split down the middle, dead bolt still sticking out of the piece of wood that was once a part of the door. That's lying on the floor next to the empty DVD rack, and gym clothes.
Seems girlfriend had left her gym bag and the thief used it to cart off her movies and DVD player, the thief also left with a leather coat ( it was cold last night) A guesstimation of less tha 2 minutes elasped between breaking down the door and skipping away, fortunately the thief must have been scared away, because nothing else in the house had been disturbed.
One neighbor says he saw someone on the front porch smoking, but didn't think anything of it because he always notices people smoking on the front porch ( non-smoking clause in lease ) that must have been the lookout.
Now, 25 minutes later the local law enforcement arrives, ( 4 blocks away ) wistfully announcing "tis the season", the door they assess was old and splintered from the empact of the thieves shoulder, prints were taken but implied to be fruitless.
Now I rush off to Lowes for a replacement door, beating on the front door I finally get the attention of the manager,( they had closed 5 minutes earlier ) explaining my delimma, he opens up, and assist me in getting a new door. Nice folks, complete with helpful hints and encouragement. ( Home Depot is building right next doorto Lowes , I will stay a Lowes customer, just due to my treatment last night )
It's 9:30 and it's time to crank up the power tools, but first we have to find them, call teen son, task him with delivering/discovering required tools. He arrives at the crime scene with half of what I need, so I go home and locate what he couldn't ( if it was a snake it would have bit him applies here )
It's now 10:15, measure twice cut once, Door is trimmed to fit and placed in frame to test. Now locate and inset hinges, measured from old door, cut route,and drill pilot holes for screws. Cordless screwdriver dies, spare battery dead. Go back home to locate a simple flat tip screwdriver, find a pink handled excuse for an ice pick of a screwdriver, return to door work.
It's now midnight, begin to set door on hinges, it's upside down, turn it over and discover hinges are backwards ( measured off of old door, didn't take into account back or front placement) Oh, this damn door weighs over 100lbs, so all of this manipulation is killing my back.
So, I route out the other side of the door edge, turn the hinges around, and again go to hang the door, all is well until closing the door is attempted....weather stripping below is catching the door and it's too tight to close, back down goes the door. Now it's close to 1am, and I cannot find my belt sander ( I am told it is at In-laws ) So I attempt to plane the door using my skill saw, Stevie Wonder could have done a better job.
But at least now the door fits in the hole, and speaking of holes now it's time to drill the lock holes, but where is my hole saw?
It's now 2am, oldest son who has been entertained by my lack of carpentry skills is dispatched to Wal-Mart for a hole saw, 30 min later he returns, I begin drilling with a charged battery and get about half way thru the door when the drill dies. @##$$@#$@
I get to bed around 3;30,
I just left Lowes with a corded drill and finished installing the deadbolt. Girlfriend had the audacity to complain about the noise. I would retort but she always pays the rent on time..............